Stop it.

Stop being negative. Stop letting yourself get overwhelmed. Yes, you've got a lot of work to do. But you've done far more work already. You've done more than there is left to do, you know that. Don't waste it. Get it passed and deal with everything else afterwards. Dancing's not going anywhere whether you like it or not - it's there when you're stressed, ill, tired, anxious...it's the first place you turn any time you feel negative about anything else in life, so don't turn it into a negative. It's the only thing you've ever stuck with, the only thing you understand, the place your mind perpetually wanders. You might just as well do it if you're going to think about it 18 hours of every day anyway. Stop it, you're having this.  You are all over this. You need to do this. It's getting done.

150 days to go

Here's where it becomes real again. 150 days to go, so I thought I'd write a list of what I've done and what I need to do choreography wise. I want every step finalised by the end of August, so that the following 3.5 months can be dedicated to practising and teaching and nothing else.

Solos:

1 reel step and 1 slip jig step decided on.
To do: finalise 2nd step for both, practise everything.

2 hornpipe and 1 jig step decided on.
To do: choreograph 2nd jig step and practise everything.

Sets:

All traditional sets learnt.
To do: Work on King as it's the newest one and I'm not quite there. Practise everything else.

2x hornpipe sets finalised, 1x hornpipe set step finalised.
To do: Finish 3rd hornpipe set - set part to be choreographed. Practise everything.

2x heavy jig sets finalised.
To do: Choreograph 3rd and final heavy jig set. Practise everything.

Teaching:

Most dancing steps suitable for teaching. Beginning and intermediate level steps all sorted. Some boys steps sorted thanks to possible tweaks of girls steps to make them masculine.
To do: Boys reel and boys hornpipe to be choreographed and practised. Teaching to be practised in general.

So to sum up, my choreography to do list looks like:

- 1x girls reel for me/teaching
- 1x boys reel to teach (adaptable for different levels)
- 1x slip jig to finalise
- 1x jig step for me/teaching
- 1x boys hornpipe step (adaptable for different levels)
- 1x hornpipe set set
- 1x full jig set

And my practising to do list looks like:

- EVERYTHING!

To be an example

I think the inspirational images posted in my last message definitely have a place, but I can't help but feel that something personal to each individual is far more motivating than a picture and text specifically designed to try and be inspirational. And recently I found my own personal motivation.

When I'm a TCRG, I'm not just going to be there to make up a few steps and shout a few corrections. I'm responsible for those dancers. It's not just instructing, it's a duty of care. I need to make sure their feet and ankles are strong enough to prevent injury and support them en pointe, I need to help them strengthen their cores safely to give them the lift and hold they need. I need to give them ways to prevent shin splints, I need to know how to spot when someone could be suffering from common disorders and injuries. I'm not just going to be teaching them to do a stag leap - they need to be doing everything safely. I want to train them more like ballet dancers, with each muscle considered and worked upon. Nothing neglected.

So I can't neglect myself. I can't very well insist that they do their calf raises and stretches twice a day if I allow myself to forget to do them. I can't insist on water and bananas in class over crisps and coke, if I'm eating a load of crap at my desk.

I need to inspire them. And the only way to do that is to do everything that they need to do.

So I need to pay more attention to my muscles and my physio exercises. I need to get myself (and keep myself) healthy. I can't be a hypocrite here - I have to motivate myself by remembering that I'll need to motivate them.