Thursday 20 December 2012

Attempt #2

Here's the story of how I got my results.

I opened the envelope and saw "n/a" in the first row of the percentage column. For a split second I'm like, "oh my God they gave me a zero for something?!" ...that was the oral Irish section, which I didn't need to take. D'oh.

I saw "99%, passed" in music (I know exactly where I lost a mark, I switched off during the solo tunes thinking they'd be repeated like the sets and they weren't). I then stopped paying attention to the percentages and just glanced down the result column, I couldn't help myself from skipping ahead and not reading properly. I saw unsuccessful, unsuccessful, unsuccessful, passed. I didn't see the 95% in ceili written until later. All I saw was scores in the sixties.

I looked at the second sheet with the dancing breakdown on it. I'm disappointed with their comments but they really do miss nothing. I flipped over to look at the teaching results and was both pleasantly and unpleasantly surprised with some of the comments. Personally I don't understand all of them but what do I know?

I thought, I'm not going to do it. I thought I might just have passed dancing. I thought I can't go through it all again, the expense, the long weekend. I couldn't believe I'd failed it outright.

I took a photo of the results and text it to my friend. I took photos of all the breakdowns too and sent those. We had a little text chat. Then it hit me.

I did not fail outright.

All that time, I somehow had it in my head that 70% was the "get this mark or take everything again" mark, rather than the pass mark. I thought I'd missed by a mile. I didn't miss by a mile. In fact, I missed one section by two little marks. I can't believe it took me so long to realise that I was so close.

So. I will do it again. But, I've just priced up a trip to Limerick and it's nearly £700 even if I only spend one night there. I can't justify that so soon after dropping nigh on £850 the last time. It will have to be in a full year's time, hopefully in Britain again.

That gives me a year to learn two traditional set dances (I already know Jockey in theory, just need to learn to actually dance it), and to get more practice in teaching and specifically lilting. I know I won't be as nervous next time.

It's on.

Monday 10 December 2012

It's results time

Prefacing this with two things - I'm not even sure if the Glasgow results were discussed at the weekend's meeting, and secondly I've convinced myself I've failed anyway as much as I would love to have passed.

I didn't expect to be nervous at all at results time. Even before the exam I knew it was highly unlikely that I'd pass first time so I didn't think I would get worked up about an email. When I was competing, waiting for the results was my favourite bit - it was all out of my hands and there was still a bit of hope, whereas after the results there'd just be disappointment and shrugging.

It's just real now, isn't it? When the exam was still in the future, it was the main thing. I was focusing on the exam itself, not what came after. Now that the exam is in the past, the results are the main thing. Because what comes after the results could vary so wildly. I could be setting up my classes, or I could be frantically trying to save to retake. I could be emailing in another application form, or I could be emailing in...well, whatever forms you need to fill in to make it official. I don't even know if you need to!

Everytime I look at Hotmail and there's an email, my heart jumps and flutters. So far it's either been spam or my dad!

Yes, it's real now. I might have convinced myself that I've failed but while I wait, there's still that hope. Just like when I was dancing - I might have known I'd not danced very well, but there was still the hope that I wouldn't come last. I just don't know how I'll feel if when if I see 'unsuccessful' in writing, in black and white, clear as day.

Either way, one thing is for sure.

If I fail, I'm trying again. At the earliest opportunity.

If I pass, I'm going to be a teacher. I am going to set up a class.

Wednesday 5 December 2012

18 days later

I never thought I'd reach this point. I never thought I'd actually get to the point after the exam. Well - I did it. What's there to say really? I'm kind of reluctant to write about the experience, to be honest. I've already done so, by hand in a notebook as I travelled home, but I almost don't want to type it all out. Oh, I've told the story many a time and I've relived it in my sleep many a time, but when I type I go into much more detail and I don't want to. Not yet.

Suffice it to say, I won't be surprised in the least if I don't pass. By that I actually mean I won't be surprised if I have to repeat the whole thing and fail it outright, rather than retaking just one or two sections. I think I did well where I'd expected to do poorly, but I let nerves get the better of me when I thought I'd be fine. I was sick on occasion, went blank, panicked, cried. (Not all of that in the exam room, you understand). Although when I got into the lift after my dancing exam, I was beaming, and when I got to my room, I literally yelled "YES!" Because I did it.

Teaching - it's bitterly disappointing because I know that I know what I'm doing, I know I can lilt all those tunes and teach the dances correctly, I knew the steps, I would have done better. If I wasn't so crippled with nerves. I just wasn't able to show them what I'm really like and what I really know, and that hurts.

I'm allowing myself to fantasise about passing and get excited about opening classes, because deep down I know how highly unlikely it is.

I've only made it to class once since, and haven't practised on my own or anything of the sort. I've learnt Jockey to the Fair on the assumption I'll need the "new" traditional sets on my retake, although I haven't danced it yet. I'm still in the bubble of dance, going to the qualifiers and watching the parades, but I'm not so in there as I was before. I'm allowing myself to relax and enjoy the festive season, and then we'll start back up in January.

If indeed I do have to retake the entire exam, I won't be able to afford it until winter 2013. If I only need to do one section, I might be able to swing Limerick if places are still available.

But I'm just refusing to think about it at the moment.

Merry Christmas (eventually...) to all, and to all a good night.

Tuesday 20 November 2012

One.

Wednesday 14th November

Writing this, as I am, after the exam...it's hard to remember what I felt. I know I was all over the place and couldn't concentrate on anything at work. I know I packed after work. I know I slept ok. I don't actually think I felt too bad!

Tuesday 13 November 2012

Two.

Tuesday 13th November.

10.35am
I actually can't believe that this is the date today. Two. Days.

I took the shoes to the cobbler today to get the straps swapped over and not only did he do it there and then within four minutes but he didn't charge me a penny either. There are good people in the world. Speaking of which I got a lovely shamrock-y Good Luck card at dancing last night and everyone was being very kind and telling me I'd be fine. I hope I don't let them down.

2.38pm
I've just looked at my to-do list for the exam, from two weeks away. Gulp.

- Complete Rodney's Glory
- Complete second hornpipe step
- Finalise boys reel step - think I've got it but will need to dance it another few times. Presumably in the hotel.
- Revise ceili tunes especially Haste vs Trip - been trying but it won't sink. Another train/hotel job.
- List and print all steps for each section
- Traditionals in shoes - hotel, will have to be.
- Book return train journey
- Print all tickets and hotel confirmation
- Sort out outfits for each exam
- Packing list
- Speed for Blue Eyed Rascal - feck it, it is what it is
- Read/watch all ceilis - watched, not read
- Check new CD esp Planxty Hugh
- Props for ceili exam? - undecided. Will have a look at home and see if I can conjure something.
- Buy duct tape

I then had to add

- Get straps changed on shoes
- Fix slip jig

Oh god.

9.18pm
I'm almost chilled out here. It's certainly quiet resignation rather than quiet confidence but...I hope this feeling lasts.

Finally watched the Big Jig earlier. They've got far bigger things to be nervous about than some elderly has-been/never-was with dodgy feet and a death wish.

Monday 12 November 2012

Three.

Monday 12th November

3.15pm
At this precise moment in time I can concentrate on nothing but my own fear. Or terror, to be more exact. I have never been more afraid of anything in my entire life. I can feel my heart beating out of chest and it feels like it's grown ten times its usual size. Something's crushing my chest, anyway. I couldn't eat this morning. I had nightmares, unrelated, but a sure sign that I can't relax. I can't put it aside, I can't stop thinking about it. Even when I manage to stop thinking about it, just momentarily, the feeling is still there, and then I remember why I still feel like this and the whole thing starts again. I'm trying to breathe, I've tried Kalms but now I'm just drowsy. Despite that, I know I won't get to sleep naturally tonight. I'll have to self-medicate with something or other, just to get to sleep in the first place, and even then I'm not guaranteed rest. I'll be too hot, too cold, there'll be a nightmare, a noise will wake me.

This is utterly pathetic.

It's a dancing exam. A exam I CHOSE to do and paid for myself. An exam I can just as easily take again. An exam with options to resit or even to downgrade to the TMRF if I want. An exam that, if I decided never to do it again, wouldn't REALLY matter in the scheme of things. And yet I'm this terrified.

There is class later, my last class. I may practice alone on Wednesday evening, or I may save my legs for the exam. But either way, the last class is significant. It's a milestone to pass, one of the last markers on the home straight.

I so can't wait until it's over.

Further live panic attacks coming your way soon, you lucky lucky people.

5.26pm
A slight diversion from panic attacks [nb I am not really having full-blown panic attacks, that's just what I'm affectionately referring to my sense of foreboding as] earlier. There's been a funny smell in the office for a few days so one of the girls was rooting around under the desk and found what she thought were mouse droppings. Panic. Then another guy came in and said they were too big to be from a mouse, and therefore must be rat crap. PANIC. Then we kinda realised they were maggot-y type things so panic over for now, an amusing yet vomitworthy distraction from other woes. Now I'm back to your regularly scheduled panic. I'm sure you're relieved.

5.30pm
http://www.voy.com/217747/8932.html - oh my God I've been doing toes. I've been practising it in socks for so long that I've just fallen into doing toes instead of booting the back of my foot. Craptacular. THANK YOU Atlanta candidate! So that's on the list to practice tonight, that and Job of course as it's that little duplicated rhythm bit where I'm putting the rogue toes. Crap crap crap.

8.07pm
Finally did Piper, Rodney's and my hornpipe correctly. Bloody hornpipe. Planxty ok but no shoes yet. I try now.

8.19pm
2nd hornpipe step and Rodney's in shoes. O. K. Hitting clicks, because I'm cramped on the landing. Don't move so much and it's easier to click. It's not a race. Floppy feet but... O. K. And steps remembered.

The code for "it's going badly", is: "it's snowing. At the moment it's just sleeting.

8.40pm
Just went over on ankle practising the slip jig that doesn't bloody work. Continue.

8.54pm
Fixed this slip jig I think. Sleet has stopped but it's still cold.

Four.

Sunday 11th November

Remembrance Sunday. I stood in silence.

I think I managed about half an hour of practice today, which is shocking. I couldn't move my legs, I just couldn't. The hornpipe has been through further fixes and I went through Piper and Rodney which are typically the ones I forget at some point.

At home, wallowing in a hot bath as I couldn't face an iced one, I just resigned myself to the fact that I'm not going to pass, and what's more I'm going to fail badly. I'm going to fail outright because how on earth can I scrape above 50% on dancing? It was pitiful, honestly. All over the place.

Well feck it, it's too late now so I'll just do the bloody thing and laugh about it afterwards.

Praying for:

Reel - jig - White Blankets - Miss Brown's - Rub the Bag - St Patrick's Day - Garden of Daisies.

And also praying to teach:

Girls prelim jig - girls prelim/open reel - any ceili I've actually taught before.

Oh God. Four days of nightmares ahead.

Five.

Saturday 10th November

Danced. Too much pain. Most of the session was fixing my hornpipe, because it just wasn't working and I would have looked ridiculous struggling over steps that simple. So, it's changed, it's still fairly simple but at least I can do it and at least it works.

Ballsed-up Rodney's multiple times.

I had to call it a day when my foot felt broken - I knew it wasn't broken, but I'm not taking risks this close to the exam.

Bad dress rehearsal?

Oh, I also need a strap replaced on the heavy shoes because I'm convinced it's going to wear through.

At the end of practice I realised, this time next week it is OVER. Can't wait.

Six.

Friday 9th November

No dancing. Too much pain.

Friday 9 November 2012

Seven.

Thursday 8th November

There was no way I could dance today. I could barely walk. I had to content myself with a massage and while that's not particularly thrilling, I didn't want to miss a day out of my countdown.
 

Wednesday 7 November 2012

Eight.

Wednesday 7th November

Practice session live blogging, haha.

I am so heavy. Very few parts of my lower extremities don't ache.

Warm up done, ended up on wrong foot in Blackbird.

Just. Did. A. Whole. Planxty. In. Shoes. And it was o-k. Surprised myself with the strength of the sound in places but messed up a few times, not horrifically or enough to make me stop though.

I'm so dead, so heavy. Thighs, calves on fire, shins complaining, arches SCREAMING. Well, I've been at work and driving all day, I'm stiff. At the exam it'll be morning, well rested hopefully, nice long, slow, gentle warm up.

I think Rodney's is sticking in my head now.

Why is it I can hit clicks on a Monday but not a Wednesday?

Not every class is going to be amazing I guess.

I hurt.

Tuesday 6 November 2012

Nine.

Tuesday 6th November

Sorted the hornpipe. That's it then, I now have every single dance prepared and choreographed. Home straight.

Ten.

Monday 5th November

So, this is the real countdown.

At class last night I worked my arse off, I really did. More Rodney run-throughs, even in shoes I think, and that's going ok. Fixed the start so I don't have a 1/4 of a bar where I'm kinda bopping on the spot waiting for the music.

I than ran through every single set dance, some more than once, some in shoes and some not depending on how much my feet were complaining. I was hitting clicks, even donkeys, I felt like I was turning my feet out, it was ok. I was having minimal breaks so I feel like my stamina's better, it was good.

Also ran through Garden and Job a few times, did my new reel step and few times and surprised myself with the height of my kick, did my two jig steps and one hornpipe - in short, pretty near killed myself.

I think in conclusion, as long as I don't blank (as I was doing consistently on Piper), I'll get more than 50%. If I really really pull it out of the bag, I think I might even stand a chance of passing.

Today: make up hornpipe step. Got a germ of an idea, we'll see how we go.

Sunday 4 November 2012

Sets

Right then, all sets are done. Rodney's was choreographed in my head over a wine on Friday night and practised on Saturday - it's working ok. Just a case of remembering now. Hurry the Jug and Piper are both working and again with Piper, it's just a memory thing. I was doing it in shoes on Monday night and kept getting confused, not least because my iPod earphone kept slipping out. Can you sweat from your ears?!

I was practising Garden on Saturday too and tried to visualise three stony-faced examiners watching me. Effed it up about five times in a row, terrific. I have no idea whether the nerves are going to ruin everything for me. I was trying to style it out and keep dancing as I know I have to keep going at all costs, but it's still a huge drop in points and practically unforgivable in a trad.

I can't practise as much as I want to because of this damn leg. Left lower calf feels like it's going to snap. I'm just not brave enough to push through too much, so it's only going to be another 4 or 5 sessions over the next 10 days (it's in 11 days I think but not counting today). Eek, not sure I'll even be able to manage that, thinking about it.

To do list:

Dance Planxty and Rodney's properly - dance the shit out of all of them, really.

Fix hornpipe step for solo section. Can't believe I'm not ready on this yet.

Think about teaching steps. I already know I'm probably going to use my Miss Brown's step as a jig step for teaching, but no idea on hornpipe - particularly a boy's hornpipe.


Thursday 1 November 2012

Writtens

I'm probably going to do daily updates at the moment, even though I've temporarily set the blog on private for my own sanity. It's two weeks today. Last night I wanted to go and practice, but my legs were still very sore from Monday night and I'm paranoid about injuring myself too badly to dance at all. Plus I was at work late, then the journey home was horrible due to torrential rain so bad I could barely see the road markings, and it was miserable, and so I thought I'd put my brand new dining table and chairs to good use and set myself up for a written session.

I'm a bit worried in that I steam through past ceili papers and usually get them done within an hour, including distractions like chatting to the husband or getting up to get a drink or checking Facebook or whatever.

To save time I was marking my paper while doing a music quiz, and I got 97% on the paper and 100% on the music. My version of the music quiz is longer as well, I can fit 30 lines on my paper so I do 30 tunes on shuffle. If I don't get 100% on the real music exam and 90%+ on the ceili, I'll be disappointed, honestly.

After that I tried to choreograph some Rodney but it just wasn't working - I'll try again tonight.

The other night the husband said "I'm proud of you for how hard you're working on this."

:)

Wednesday 31 October 2012

What hurts?

Stolen from another dance blogger - a catalogue of my current ailments.

- Right calf muscle: stiff and sore
- Left calf muscle, specifically lower calf into achilles: honestly felt for a second that I'd torn it on Monday night. Very tight and painful when walking. Quite concerned about this and may give it an extra day's rest. The left achilles has been the most problematic for months.
- Shins: Heavens to goodness, they are on fire again. Even to the touch, and I'm sure one of them is so hurt it's bruised. It doesn't go all the way up to the knee, quite, but just above the ankle it's not even confined to the shin. It's like a thick ring of fire, three inches of hell all the way around. Complete disaster zone.
- Quads: Clearly a result of doing mostly heavies, stamping and banging.

On-off problems include the following list of horrors (fitting since it's Hallowe'en).

- Arches: Yes, still. But only ever while I'm dancing. The pain is sometimes unbearable in light shoes, generally unbearable in heavy shoes, but often completely absent when dancing in socks alone. I dance in heavies until I can't bear it anymore, rip them off, walk around to loosen them, and dance a few steps in socks. That seems to alleviate the problem but even daily arch-support-wearing isn't helping.
- Foot thing: On the top of the right foot, bony bit just below the smaller 3 toes. Yesterday I was getting occasional stabbing pains there, lasting 30 seconds. Not triggered by movement and I was fine to weight-bear. Completely gone now.
- Left big toe: Sprained this one so often that any time I attempt pointe work it freezes/jams and I can't stand on tiptoe/demi-pointe without sickling outwards anymore. So I'm just avoiding pointe until the exam. When I was competing I tried the same tack, only to forget to actually go up en pointe when I was on stage. Genius.
- Lung/rib pain: Let's not go there.
- Very centre of left thigh/pelvic join. Let's seriously not go there.

I hope you appreciate everything I'm doing for you, Irish dancing. I love you. Y u no love me back?

Scheduled.

So it's real - the timetable's out. I've got GREAT times, I'm really grateful as it's just fallen exactly the way I would have wanted it. Not too early, not too late, and I can cancel the third night in the hotel.

And what's more, a handy little notice has gone up about a June exam in Limerick which I'll probably be able to make should I need to.

I'm having minor panic attacks all the time (I'm exaggerating, it's not that bad. The odd wave of nausea and Fear with a capital F that Rescue Remedy or Kalms can't touch), but strangely I also feel almost relaxed?

My dancing group is quite cool - no terrifying world champions although there are some very good dancers in it. And looking at the names of people who are retaking sections, I kinda feel like well if someone as amazing as them needs two attempts, then there's no shame whatsoever in me needing two attempts. You never know how you'll react to nerves, whether you'll go blank - a disaster can happen to anyone so so what if it happens to me?

Daily, I am mummified in tubigrip from arch to knee and slathered in Deep Freeze, Deep Heat, ibuprofen gel or some other concoction or potion. I'm rattling - as well as the fear pills, I'm on ibuprofen and the 'old faithful' Anadin Extra several times a day. This is absolutely killing me. I thought I'd torn my lower calf on Monday night, I've got blisters on top of blisters, I can't walk in the morning, my quads complain every time I dare to stand from sitting.

But I'm kind of enjoying it.

I feel like I've done what I originally set out to do, which was to learn all the ceilis and all the traditional sets (well, the Big Four). I wanted to learn them because I never had as a dancer, and I felt I should know them if I was to call myself an aficionado and a true fan of dancing. Mission accomplished in that respect. Then someone pointed out to me that if I was going to learn all that anyway, I might just as well get on with it and do the full TCRG exam. Crazy, I called them. I was right. But so were they.

I honestly couldn't be without it. What would I think about all day? What would I do at Easter?! What would I look at on the internet?

I'm still not quite ready, mind. The Trip to the Cottage and Leslie's Hornpipe tunes are kind of evading me, though I can do the rest with a bit of preparation. I'm a set down and that needs sorting quickly. Stamina, in shoes, is awful - in socks I can bang out a Planxty Drury no problem - the shoes sap my stamina and strength, make me lose my concentration, kill my poor arches. I need a second hornpipe step, and quickly.

But it's not tooooo bad. Ceilis fine, music fine, got some decent teaching steps including a dead difficult girls reel. Oh yes, need to think about boy's hard shoe steps for teaching.

It's not going to be that bad. I'm going to be fine. Don't you worry, don't you worry child.

And then I can have a bloody nice massage and a sleep on Monday 19th November.

Friday 26 October 2012

Céim an Fháinne

Just trying to make sure that concentrating on solo dancing doesn't result in me neglecting the book-smarts bit of the TCRG exam. I revised music last night which was fine, so let's look at ceili and Ar Rince Foirne.

Céim an Fháinne is 'Rings', of course, and it's important to know which direction each ring travels in. Here's a list, crossing fingers I haven't missed anything out:

1 - Four Hand Reel
Rings only appears in the first figure of this dance, handily called 'Figure of Eight and Rings of Three'. The ring is performed twice. First time it goes right/left, second time it goes left/right. Repeated in the same way when opposites perform the figure.

2 - Sixteen Hand Reel
Called Hands Round in this dance, and appears in the body. Both times the ring travels left/right.

---

3 - Haste to the Wedding
First ring right, second ring left. Each ring travels one way only.

4 - Siege of Carrick
Left/right

5 - Glencar Reel
Left/right

6 - Three Tunes
Called 'sides' in this dance as rings is something different entirely. Left/right/right/left.

7 - Trip to the Cottage
Again this appears in the body, and is performed left/right. The gent therefore, if you have the spare gent dancing, does two right feet - one to join the ring and one as part of the ring.

8 - An Rince Mor
No excuses for forgetting because it's in the title - Ring to Left and Right

---

9 - Fairy Reel
Performed twice - first time right/left, second time left/right.

10 - Duke Reel
This is the opening movement and goes right/left.

11 - Lannigan's Ball
Left/right - and remember, this one is skipped not sidestepped.

12 - Cross Reel
In Figure of Eight and Ring, all sidestep right/left.

13 - Gates of Derry
Performed twice - first time right/left, second time left/right.

14 - Sweets of May
This is both the opening movement and a figure (plus the closing movement, too). As in Tunes, they go left/right/right/left.

15 - Bonfire Dance
Performed twice - first time right/left, second time left/right.

Here's a gratuitous picture of dancers in a ring:



Anti-clockwise is the same as sidestepping to the right.
Clockwise is the same as sidestepping to the left.

So, can I see any patterns here?

...not really.

Second book - all go left first except Haste.
Tunes and Sweets are the same, which should be easy to remember as they're both Antrim dances and have lots of other similarities.
Where it's performed twice, it always goes right/left and then left/right.

I suppose it's just a memorisation task as I can't think of any tricks!

Saturday 20 October 2012

Bognor Regis

I'm not sure this town could have a more unpleasant name, to be honest. But, it's my favourite of all the competitions. Love how busy it is. I have one or two people in particular I'm rooting for with all of my willpower - if only one day I could have dancers like them.

In other news, like the more important, TCRG exam-relevant news, I think I've completed Piper and Hurry the Jug. I think I've got a step for Rodney's as well.

So....close...

Friday 12 October 2012

Today I must...

...fix the Piper. Or make a start on Rodney's. I absolutely must do something about these dances before it's too late. I'm practising on Sunday, another big one, and I absolutely must have something to work on during that session for one or both of these dances.

Choreography you see, isn't a practical thing for me.  Meaning I don't put my shoes on and physically choreograph. For me choreography is a thinking exercise, so I think it all out and dance it when I'm happy with it. Sometimes it needs fixes, sometimes (jig) it doesn't. Everyone choreographs differently and that's my way. I just need to bloody get around to it.

Monday 8 October 2012

38

Thirty-eight days and I'm so busy. Not with TCRG exam prep you understand, though I'm fitting it in. Busy with absolutely everything else. Why can't studying and practising be my full-time job?!

I do feel like my sets are getting stronger. I've got 4.5 jigs, just need a set for Hurry the Jug. They're all ok - I'm clearing up mistakes, ankles are getting looser, turnout is happening. I've got two completed hornpipe sets which are fine - then one to tweak, and then one to choreograph from scratch.

And oh my God, I know Garden of Daisies now! It's not the version most people do, so I hope I don't let other people throw me when they do the usual version. This version is just as correct but rarer - it's won championships so I know it's ok to do. 

Solos - I've decided which heavy jig steps I'll do in the exam. I made quite a nice one up a couple of weeks ago and can finally do the stamps on left, and for the second step I tweaked an existing one and made it slightly more difficult. Quite happy with those.

I know one of the hornpipe steps I'm doing, just need to actually dance it a few times, and then learn the other one I've been given.

I've decided on one reel and one slip jig for the exam for definite - I thought I'd decided on the second reel step but have decided it's a bit too similar to the first so I'll try something else. For the other slip jig step I could go back to my original lead but really I'd rather do something newer and prettier to show off my feet a bit more.

Ceilis - I'm breezy. Music likewise. I can even lilt most of the ceili music now. I have a skirt to wear in the exam, and a wrapover cardigan so I can look all balletesque and professional.

Not hyperventilating just yet. Even if I do still toy with the idea of getting them to change my application to TMRF. :-/

Friday 28 September 2012

Hornpipe practice

At 5.10pm last night I was in the ladies toilet at work, grappling with a sports bra. The single most unattractive item of clothing ever invented by mankind. The reason for all of this was that I was determined to get another practice in this week - I'd done two hours Sunday, ceili on Monday, swimming on Tuesday, and then had to rest my calves on Wednesday.

However, the hall I can use for free hosts bingo on a Thursday, and the Ring and Ride arrives promptly at 7pm. So I knew that in order to get a meaningful hour of practice in, I'd have to change at work.

At 5.25pm last night I was massaging ibuprofen gel into my arches while sitting at my desk discussing hand injuries with the cleaner.

I managed to make it to the hall just before 6pm, didn't bother rearranging the furniture, and did a quick warm up while listening to the radio. Then it was straight onto hornpipe sets and, similar to Sunday, I decided to start with trad sets. Blackbird fine, I like this one. Job I learnt from a video and I wasn't entirely sure which foot I was meant to be on at various points in the set, but I've figured it out I think.

White Blankets, fine. The treble-toe-cut sequence thing that flummoxed me last time was working fine, and I came up with a fix for a toe-over-toe-over-toe bit that I still can't get. It's now toe-over-toe and toes 234.

Blue Eyed, fine. Need faster feet at the end.

Piper, woeful. Basically the steps don't really work so I need to start afresh. Annoying, but I can keep some of it and at least it's short.

At this point my feet were burning and the G&T crew were beginning to arrive so I stomped off home in the rain.

I guess it's a lesson that not every practice session is going to be amazing - Sunday was SO GOOD, I enjoyed every minute of it and I made some really good progress, with the only real damage being some sock-friction on the balls of my feet. Yesterday I was tired, slightly grumpy, sore of foot, and pressed for time.

Workshop this weekend. I'll be rectifying Garden of Daisies, learning some hornpipe rhythms to fit into Piper and Rodney's, and basically dancing in front of people which I hate, but need to get over quickly.

I can't believe Atlanta is in progress already. I can't believe I'm in the next exam. Christ.

Sunday 23 September 2012

Guess what I'm doing?

Planxty Drury. In full. Again and again and again. Getting there.

Fiddler and Rub are ok. Warmed up with St Paddy's Day as it's jig day today. When I finally get this fecking Planxty right it'll be on to Miss Brown's, and possibly a new jig I've been inaginationing.

Phew.

Right, break over. Da-da-da da dadada da da da da-da da da da da daaaa, da da da da da-da da da dadadadaa...

Tuesday 18 September 2012

Run through

Let's dial back the panicking a little and have a run through of where I'm at. You never know, it might not be as bad as I think. I shall work through what I know and what I don't, in rough TCRG exam order. You'll notice that some things are in colour - I added that at the end of typing the post, so see the end for an explanation.

Ceili written
Absolutely no concerns. I know I can pass this, and that I can pass it well. I'm keeping up with my past papers (scoring above 90% on the majority), I've danced/taught most of them in class, I keep reading the book, I keep watching the videos. Here, I'm confident.

Music
Likewise, no concerns. I listen to the sets often - sometimes just identifying the tune in my head before looking down to check and then skipping to the next tune, sometimes listening to them in full, sometimes doing a full-on quiz where I have to write the bars and so on as well. I generally get 100%, although I do have to count Garden and Job. I don't think I'll have any trouble identifying the solo tunes (reel, slip jig, hop jig, jeavy jig, hornpipe, right?)

Own dancing
- Reel: I'm 100% decided on one of the steps I'll dance if asked. I have a selection of others, none of which I'm completely happy with, but there are lots to choose from.
- Hop jig and light jig: On the very unlikely offchance that I have to dance either of these, no problem. Got full dances at both standard and intermediate level to choose from.
- Slip jig: I'm 100% decided on my second step. First step, not sure yet but again I have lots to choose from. As with my reel steps, I just need to give them a dance through and see which ones feel best - I've been thinking about them all morning.

Heavies
- Heavy jig: Unsure. One step I can definitely use with a tweak (remove drum rolls). Two or more steps that I can use with a couple of tweaks, and an idea for a completely new step. It's doable, anyway - jig is my stronger heavy dance.
- Hornpipe: No clue. I have two steps, but the timing isn't what I'm used to - a little syncopated here and there, and frankly at this point I think it's a waste of time trying to figure it out. I think I'd be better served using them as a base and coming up with fixes. I think I have enough nice flourishes in my hornpipe sets to prove I can do the rhythm, let's go simpler for the solo steps.

Traditional sets
- St Patrick's Day - no problems, brush up.
- Blackbird - as above.
- Job of Journeywork - not tooooo bad, need to work out what foot I'm meant to be on and practise it more so that I'm not making a small mistake each time, but it'll get there.
- Garden of Daisies - I started learning this from a friend. No, let's be honest, she taught me all of it but I haven't thought about it since so I can only remember tiny bits of it. I literally need to relearn this.

Modern sets
- White Blankets - it needs a tweak because I accidentally repeated part of the set in the step of Blue Eyed, so it'll be easier to fix in this dance. I need to make sure I don't mess up that toe-cut-down sequence.
- Fiddler Round the Fairy Tree - it's ok, if I remember not to jump-treble into the left foot of the step, because that's not what it is. The set is quite strong, for me.
- Blue Eyed Rascal - need to get my feet quicker at the very end, and make sure I don't go off time after the walkover clicks. Not too bad.
- Rub the Bag - needs a few run throughs, but not bad. Passable.
- Planxty Drury - Confident on the step, need more run throughs on the set. I can do each part, I just haven't practised it much all put together.
- The Piper - really not sure about this one at all. I'm not sure the set works, it might need re-choreographing. Perhaps I was just having a bad day but one of the treble sequences that I seriously over-used in this dance was not happening at ALL. Faster feet.
- Miss Brown's Fancy - Step should be fine. Set needs to be danced as I've choreographed but not run through it yet, but it should fit and be ok.

That leaves one more set of each timing. Short is king so I'm thinking Rodney's Glory, just to throw a 2/4 in there really, and then I need to pick a jig. I was thinking Hurry the Jug - then I thought Hurling Boys as it's two bars shorter (I know...) and then I thought, why the heck not just call it a day and go for Sprig of Shillelagh?! I'll see. I might be able to borrow from a friends.

^ Seriously, how huge is that section?!?!

Solo teaching
- Reels: Beginner, primary, intermediate/prelim steps all ready to go. LOADS to choose from. I've got an open reel or two in my head for both girls and boys, but again I will need to dance them to make sure they fit.
- Hop and light jigs - fine, see own dancing above.
- Slip jigs: Beginner, primary, intermediate/prelim steps all ready to go. Open steps...it depends what they class as open steps. Some dances these days, even ones that win championships, are incredibly straightforward - just danced very nicely indeed. Need to give this one a bit more thought. I love slip jigs and I dance them well, I just haven't come up with one that I really like in ages.

- Heavy jigs: I've got beginner, or I've got prelim level girls steps. No in-betweenies, nothing really boy-style. I could chop down some of my jig sets to work as an open-ish level jig set, and I've learnt some quite complicated rhythm bits recently which I hope will be seen as difficult enough for open.
- Hornpipe: Kinda same as the above. Nothing that's really suitable for primary, nothing for a boy. Again, I could use set steps. More thought.

Ceili teaching
I'm fairly relaxed about this. I want to take in bracelets or something to differentiate between boys and girls, and I think I could keep 8 kids straight. For both teaching exams, I'm ok at lilting now. I even lilt to chart songs sometimes, without thinking?! I need to brush up on the ceili tunes, though. I recognise them all when played, but they're not going to be. I need to get better at just remembering them and being able to lilt them straight off. Where are we...
Humours of Bandon - just about.
Haste to the Wedding - I usually go straight to part b, but I'm getting there with part a.
Three Tunes - I'm GREAT with the repeated bits (the tunes that correspond with Rings, Stamp & Clap, and the Roly Poly). I'm not so hot on the first part of each tune.
St Patrick's Day - I think it would be quite bad if I wasn't confident on this one.
Trip to the Cottage - I think I've just sung it in my head...I'd need to listen and check though.
Lannigan's Ball - strangely, this is the one I'm most confident on.
Rakes of Mallow - although I'm quite confident on this one as well.
Sweets of May - I sometimes trip myself up on part a, but part b (the body tune) is fine. Especially Ringing the Bells!

Now, are we supposed to know the Quaker's Wife even though it only says it's the favourite tune for the Gates of Derry? I suppose it's one of those unwritten things.

I've just typed all this out, which is I'm sure horrible boring for anyone foolish enough to have read this from beginning to end...! I shall now go through and highlight areas for work. Red for serious work and amber for meh...a bit. If it's not in colour then it doesn't mean I'm going to ignore it, it's just not an immediate priority.

Whether I choose to add anything further to this post depends wholly on how colourful it ends up being...

I guess it wasn't THAT bad. It's definitely not going to pass itself, though.

Monday 17 September 2012

Panic

I am very nearly shaking with fear. It's in two months.

I've been back and forth with worry today. I choreographed the rest of Miss Brown's, so now I only have two more sets to choreograph, and I felt almost relaxed. That's like, a month to make up two more (short!) dances, and a month to practise. I thought it was doable. I thought I should have been taking a big deep breath and chilling out.

But then I did the worst possible thing I could do and read over a former candidate's diary, just to see how she was getting on two months before. Well she'd finished all her sets and steps but was still struggling with the writtens, so I felt neutral. Then I read her account of the exam and not passing, and I started to get hot and shaky. She retook the whole thing and wrote about that too, which of course I read because I'm a sucker for punishment, and again - panic.

I really don't mind retaking dancing and teaching if I need to. I don't imagine I'm going to pass outright first time. It's just that dreaded 50% - this girl taught all the time and got under 50% on the teaching, what hope do I have? The only hope I have is that I can talk, so hopefully I can blunder through if I can explain my way.

I can't afford to take it all again, it's so very expensive and it's taken me over two years to save up just for the exam - I haven't even thought about how I'm going to pay for travel and accommodation (and new legs) yet.

Oh my god. I can't take two whole months of this panic. I've genuinely considered downgrading to the TMRF. What if I injure myself before then? Like, the day before or something?! So much to worry about.

At least I haven't started dreaming about it yet...

Tuesday 11 September 2012

Proud.

I'm sitting in the living room watching the Great British Bake Off and marking a past paper at the same time. Derry 2011, I gave myself 96%. My average this year is 95.36%. But that's not why I'm proud, I'm proud of it, but that's not the reason for the post.

I was flicking through the book looking for the answers, and I found each page automatically. As I checked my answer to the Sweets of May and I lilted the tune aloud.

And I thought, bloody hell. When I started this blog, a million moons ago, I knew nothing. I knew the Walls of Limerick and I knew what the word feis meant. Honestly, that's how far I feel like I've come. I'd danced in championships, I could recite trivia, but I didn't really know much about dancing. Ever since then I've been watching, constantly. Always looking, watching, evaluating, thinking. I see dancing in a totally different way now, I'm a different dancer and a different person.

I can't believe I've learned this entire book. It's less than 80 pages, big deal I guess - but it is a big deal for me. I just can't believe I've done it. I know I know the book whether I pass or not, and that was the whole point of trying to pass this exam for me. I wanted to learn the ceilis and the trad sets because I never had, and I felt I should. I felt I couldn't be a real Irish dancer unless I knew these crucial things, these things that keep us rooted in the past while we chase the future in our solo dancing. The basis of Irish dancing, our history, the classics.

I guess I'll have that to fall back on if I don't pass. I only ever really wanted to learn these things out of respect for this art form, and now that I've done that, everything else is a bonus.

Congratulations to everyone that passed today, particularly "AinetheDragon" slash "Aine'sTRTO". She knows the online me but not the real me, and I always find her posts interesting and insightful. Well done her.

Monday 10 September 2012

66

Sixty-six days to go. This number appeals to me for some reason. It might prove to be the day I actually get revved up and start really working - not just start working, but sustain it all the way through until Glasgow.

The Toronto candidates are waiting for their results, and might hear this week. That kind of inspires my choice of dancing art today:


If I'd painted this (which I didn't, this talented person did), I probably would have called it "Relief". Two rounds over - out of her hands. Nerves conquered. All that's left now is to wait, and perhaps have a hopeful run through of her set. I guess regardless of the result for Toronto candidates, it will be a relief to finally know. TCRG or not, one retake or all. Open a school or open ARF again. One way or the other, it'll be good to know.

So with sixty-six days to go before I even start the exam, let alone sit waiting for results, how am I doing?

The writtens I could, as ever, probably do in my sleep. I think ceili teaching will be ok if I can control my nerves and to be honest, by that point, the worst of it will be over. I'm actually really grateful, thinking about it, for the set-up of the exam. I get to start with my strongest sections and hopefully give myself a confidence boost.

For dancing, I'm almost feeling quietly confident. I know I have good rhythm and I can do a couple of tricks and rhythm sections that will, hopefully, make my steps passable. I still have sets to choreograph, my other sets need tidying, but I'm less negative about this than I have been.

Solo teaching is still a worry. I have no idea what I'll do if they give me an open champ boy and tell me to teach him a hornpipe. Hornpipe is my weakest dance and all the steps I have are very much girls steps. I need to stop panicking about this and ask for help. I do have boys reels options though which I think would be difficult enough for a champ boy. Skater turn, couple of clicks, stamp a bit, done. I guess I'm just kind of assuming that I'll get champ-ish level girls, because most people seem to. I'd die of relief if I was asked to teach a primary reel! Or a light jig!

I'm not under the impression I'll pass first time, but I'm really really hoping that it'll be two sections at most to repeat.

Friday 24 August 2012

Monday 20 August 2012

87

87 days to go.

Continuing on a theme of posting an inspirational picture, I found this today:


There's so much life and colour in it - their legs are a blur, almost spirit-like, and it's interesting that there's not much detail on their faces. They're part of the whole, important but not important. Creating the dance but secondary to the dance itself. I even find the source fascinating - an Irish painter who's lived in Iceland for decades.

Aside from waxing lyrical, the true point of the post is a progress update but of course I wanted to make it less boring :)

Wednesday 15th Aug - calf stretches (sorely needed, literally) and arch exercises. Also scored 99% on a past paper. I do take that with a pinch of salt as of course I'm marking my own work, but I still believe I'll pass this comfortably.

Thursday 16th - Ran through three traditional sets - St Patrick's Day, Blackbird and Job of Journeywork - each time doing them over and over until I'd done them right all the way through. Job was a struggle as parts I could barely remember. I was taught Garden a few months ago but I haven't even thought about it since so that will need some serious revision. I then moved on to modern sets, and ran through the White Blankets and Fiddler Round the Fairy Tree - again until I'd done them right. Blankets was a mystery - there's a dead easy treble-toe-cut sequence that I could do with my eyes closed ordinarily, but it just was not happening. It was almost funny how I couldn't make myself do it! Eventually I got it straight in my head again but that could definitely do with some tidying, and I need to change the end combination as I've used it in another set and I can't have that kind of repetition.

Friday 17th - Swam again, this time 1,000m in about 50 minutes. I also did some stretches and some work with the resistance of the water, like jogging on the spot kicking my bum, making sure toes were pointed and that I was landing turned out. Very tiring - it'll take a while to get back up to full swimming fitness I think - I used to go three times a week but haven't been regularly for well over two years.

Saturday and Sunday - weekends are always difficult, and there's no class at the moment. I made a token gesture of revising music both days, and also made up two slip jig steps which I was very proud of as they're very different to the stuff I'd been thinking up recently, and much more like the kind of slip jig I want to dance. 

That's me up to date. Monday today, so ceili class with a bit of solo practice thrown in as and where I can.

Tuesday 14 August 2012

Heart and mind

Last week, I read this quote on Facebook. I don't normally go for sentimental bullshit but this actually got to me. It might be important to you too.

If you want to know where your heart lies, look to where your mind wanders.


It's always dancing. I only ever daydream about dancing. Dancing is the only thing constantly stuck in my head. So, I've got to pass this exam.

For some reason, the quote reminded me of this picture. I haven't seen it for ten or more years, but through the wonders of Google I've discovered it again. Somehow, this picture is what dancing is to me. So I'm posting it here to remind me that this is where my mind wanders. Which is why I'm doing this, and why I'm going to pass.

Thursday 26 July 2012

Sets and nationals

Hi, it's been two months.

I'm doing....er..okay.

I've finished my Planxty Drury, in that I know all the steps and just need to practise and polish, and maybe change the treble bit that I can't quite do. I can't actually believe I've gone for a 40 bar set after vowing not to do anything over 32 (or 28 in hornpipe), but there you have it. It's quite easy, short on toestands, interesting rhythms.

Next up is the Piper - I've got a step sorted, it's quite girly and floaty and whimsical, to match how I feel when I listen to the music. I know how I'm going to open and close the set part, and a couple of ideas for the middle bit, but it needs a bit more thought. It'll be pretty - I have a very girly style emerging, I think. Especially in hornpipe as I've always thought it's kinda the slip jig of heavy dancing. All the nicest set tunes are hornpipes in my opinion.

Most importantly, I'm off to the British Nationals this arvo. I really need this, I really need to see some beautiful dancing again. Claire, Suzanne and Simona reprise their worlds battle. Watch some ceilis and try to spot faults in prep for the teaching exam. I'm so looking forward to this! And the 25th anniversary to boot - nearly as old as me! - happy birthday, BNs!

Tuesday 29 May 2012

Round of sixteen

Mixing my metaphors here, it's tennis season!

We recently tackled the Sixteen Hand Reel at class for the first time. Really enjoyed it. It's actually not a difficult dance at all, it's just the sheer number of people to keep track of. The actual movements are simple enough and the first four movements of the body are just hop 234567 back 23 back 23, lather rinse repeat. No Olive videos on YouTube but this group go through the body after the first figure:



I wish this was an option for competition. It would be a good bridge between ceilis and figure dances as well, getting kids used to moving around 15 other people and staying in line. If there was a 16 hand jig as well then it could be its own competition. Actually, I'd LOVE to make up my own ceili. How do you get them ARF-approved? ;)

Seriously though, I can't be making up ceilis when I've not finished my set dances yet. I've done a fair amount of practising my current sets in my shoes, and apart from turnout and the occasional memory lapse they're not too bad. I just need to remember that actually only one of my jigs starts with bounce treble up swing up - seems like every time I dance any jig I do the opening of my Fiddler step without thinking.

I haven't tackled any written practice in a while but I'm still confident on this so no worries. The worry is only practising once a week in heavies, but genuinely most weeks it's all I can manage. 171 days to go. That's 24 weeks or so. 24 heavy practises will NOT pass me this TCRG exam. Step it up.

Saturday 5 May 2012

Happy dancer

I feel very proud of myself today. I've done exactly what I said I was going to do yesterday - I've practised, And I've practised a lot, for me. Around 11am I began a steady warm-up, working through various exercises and warming up each part of my feet that gives me trouble, particularly the achilles. I had a nice little routine going there which would be ideal for a champ class, something they could do at home and at a feis too. I stretched, I bounced, I did some weights as well to ensure my upper body wasn't woefully neglected.

I ran Blue Eyed time after time. It's not perfect, but it's progress. I need faster feet at the end. But I know the choreography works and I like the steps.

I ran my one jig step a few times. God it was woeful on the left foot. I did a little shuffle at one point and shouted out loud "WHAT was that?!" But then I started dancing it stronger, really dancing it, and it was beginning to work and I was beginning to get it on time.

Rub the Bag - I thought, just blast it. I read over my steps to review and thought I'd just give it a go. I LOVE this set. I feel foolish for disliking it, I feel a bit sorry for it. I'm really pleased with the steps and fixed the ending so it fits. I end up on a different foot each time at the very end but they (the examiners) won't know that. It's 100% my own work, no input from a single soul, and I'm really really proud of it. I'm not dancing it perfectly but I'm not overly concerned with that, my TCRG exam is not tomorrow.

I won't pretend I danced flat out for hours on end. I've been dancing on and off, mostly off, for about three hours. I was breathing heavily after one step, I'm out of shape. I knew that. It will all help though won't it? Each time I will get a little closer because I vow to not let myself stop until at least something, at least ONE thing, is better. If you make a small improvement every single practice, then over time they will add up to a big improvement. This is elementary stuff, why did I not realise this earlier, when I was - you know - a DANCER?!

It's only half past two at the moment. I don't want to call it a day. I want to keep getting up and doing a bit more here and there. But I want to be able to dance tomorrow, and currently the balls of my feet are burning.

The day is young. I could throw in another past paper and a music quiz, I can finish reading the autobiography, I can watch clips on Youtube for inspiration, I could do some work with my Jean Butler dvd...and still have time to cook my dinner and have a relaxing evening :)

Yes, a happy dancer indeed. A happy candidate indeed. Cheers, MF. Worked a small miracle there, so you did.

Lord of the Dance

So I'm reading his autobiography, so help me god. I've generally been decidedly anti-Flatley, but this has been a bit of an eye-opener.

First, because it made me feel so god-damn guilty for not practising this evening. And absolutely determined to practise all bloody day tomorrow. His work ethic is utterly infectious - anybody reading the book would be motivated to get up and practise, even if they didn't even do Irish dancing. It'd inspire a footballer to go and drill penalties or something; a pianist to go and drill scales. He worked hard and look where he got, look where we all could end up. If I lose this motivation I'm going to be so pissed off at myself which is really why I'm writing this.

Second, because it confirmed everything I'd ever heard first-hand. Over the years I've known, danced with, and been taught by women who've danced in his shows. Let's just leave it there and say it's all true, what they said.

Just before the book got to Eurovision night, I put it down and picked up my phone. I opened Youtube and I searched for the first ever performance of Riverdance. And from the moment Katie McWotsit first opened her mouth it was as much as I could do to keep from crying. Here's a girl who took up dancing post-Riverdance without ever having seen Riverdance. I've seen it tonnes of times since of course, but tonight I think I actually saw it for the first time. How I would have seen it if I'd been a dancer back in 1994, with 15 years experience, wondering what the hell was going on. And for the first time I actually really appreciated it. I've criticised the swag, the bravado, the Trinity-style "I did this first and the world of Irish dancing owes me big time". I still think a lot of it's overexaggerated, dancing didn't necessarily need a saviour and it could really have been anybody, but my god it was good stuff.

It wasn't technically brilliant stuff; the dancers were capable of much more. Today's Riverdancers and LOTDers are capable of much much more than the show's choreography asks of them. But it's crowd pleasing,  it makes old hands cry. Most dancers know all the steps off by heart but sitting down to watch it, seeing it in a new way, it makes me appreciate what he did.

The book asserts that he invented heel clicks, that no Irish dancer had ever raised their arms. Okay love, if that makes you happy, believe it. It still grates that he felt like he was too good for competition style dancing,  that he wasn't comfortable not diluting it with arm movements - the lack of which completely makes it what it is. It grates that I'm now saying he brought us on.

He's not the greatest Irish dancer of all time. He's not the greatest Irish dancer of HIS time. But by god he's the cleverest. He made it by arrogantly thinking he was better than it was. He made it by adding elements to it and changing it from what it always was, day to day, in every church hall in Ireland. But was anybody else really going to do all that? I said above it could have been anybody - well, in the Eurovision it could have been. Right place, right time. Regardless of the book it was Moya Doherty's idea and she could have hired anybody. Colm O'Se. Anybody. But in fairness, it probably wouldn't then have continued for well over a decade.

The style of the shows grates. Why do men not do reels? Why is every big number the same formula? Song, girls light shoe, male solo, group hard shoe? Why do both shows follow the same pattern - group number, song, girls, boys, etc etc etc? Why is it that the shows that branch out and dispense with that formula, are doomed? Why are both troupes still doing exactly the same numbers nearly 20 years on?

Show dancing in Irish dancing isn't perfect. And I feel fairly confident in saying that your Prodijigs, your TapTronics...they're amazing, but they're not actually going to change the game the way Flatley did. It's been done, it can't be redone. I'm sure people pre-Riverdance felt similar, but I wouldn't want those groups to change the game as far as competitive dancing is concerned. The music needs to stay traditional at the very least; if that changes then we really do become parodies of ourselves. We really need to keep the arms by our sides; if that changes then I am 100% out, it will most definitely cease to be Irish dancing. But there's always a place for show dancing, and I for one am quite excited about where Prodijig, TapTronic, hell...even the Flatster himself, are going to take it.

I hope I'm still involved to see the next stage.

Thursday 3 May 2012

50 days goals part II

I've held back on this because I'm torn...I didn't achieve all my goals last time, so do I make fewer goals and go easy on myself, or do I make the same amount or more and just man up? Man up it is, so I'm going to set them and just get on with it. All I can do is keep chipping away.

I'm bored of music as I get 100% practically every time, so I'll reduce that target. The dancing targets obviously remain. I just about squeezed in finishing my next two sets - in fact I did Rub the Bag on the 51st or 52nd day. But, it's done so I'm counting it. And despite my last post, I actually quite like it now!

A short pause for inspiration. So graceful and effortless. The young lady who shot and edited this is also very clever indeed. [edit - I tried to make the picture a link but it wouldn't let me. Try this link].


So. Goals.

1 - Practise in heavies at least once per week.

2 - Run through at least one traditional set a week - as a warm up for the above?

3 - Choreograph two more set dances, one of each.

4 - Complete at least 5 music quizzes (that's one every 10 days).

5 - Continue past papers - 5-10 in the next 50 days.

I said the same before, but I think that's doable. It HAS to be doable, for it has to be done.

Tuesday 1 May 2012

Rub the Bag...

...til it's nice and shiny, was the way I remember the tune. Was. The way I remember the tune now is the most frustrating piece of music ever. I'm just completely stuck. I have loads of ideas of what to put in the set, but they don't fit, so I'm shelving them and revisiting them for another set. But, I still have this one to do. Nothing goes! I don't want to start again but I'm not massively happy with what I've got at either 69 or 73.

What do other people do when they've got a set that's just not working? Scrap the choreography and start again? Scrap the whole thing and start a new dance? Sleep on it?

Wednesday 11 April 2012

Keep on keeping on

I've had a really productive couple of days. Made up a ton of steps which are difficult but which I can actually do; realised I actually do crosskeys correctly after all; and learned a ridiculously difficult hornpipe treble combination which I never thought in a million years I could ever do. I'm starting to feel a little wistful about my own dancing career, such as it was, because if I knew then what I know now, I would have done much better and achieved much more. I do of course continue to toy with the idea of doing a small feis before the exam, but I think if I did well I'd just want to come out of retirement permanently and lose my TCRG exam fee money. Ha. It won't happen - maybe I will enter the intermediates or something just to give everything a run out before go-time.

We are 1/3 of the way through April now, and the end of the month marks the end of my first period of 50 days. I need to have achieved all my goals by then, so here's where I'm up to:

Learn Garden - DONE

Two new non-trad sets - nearly, got a step for both Rub the Bag and Blue Eyed, and part of the set for the latter.

Finish writing ceilis - DONE, not bad. Haven't done any of the required 5-10 practice papers yet. Will do one tonight.

Teach three new ceilis - one so far. This one isn't really up to me!

Dance in heavy shoes at least once per week - failed already, due to class attendance. Not giving up though, will continue to wear the feckers.

Drill one trad set per week - failed. Haven't done one, apart from Garden, Will do one tonight.

At least one music quiz per week - sort of, am passing them all in the 90%s so I'm not concerned.

Saturday 17 March 2012

Beannachtaí na Féile Pádraig!

Merry St Patrick's Day! Bejaysus begosh and begorrah and so on.

Today I'm celebrating the way all good TCRG candidates should celebrate - watching my ceili dvds and writing out the High Cauled Cap. Green jumper, green jewellery. Irish cider pencilled in for later on. I've got a dance class this afternoon and am home alone tonight so I'll finish writing out the first book (which means I'll've written out the whole thing) and tomorrow it'll be time to mark. Then I can start practice papers - my favourite! (I'm not being sarcastic, I love them.)

May the road rise up to meet you etc etc!

Thursday 15 March 2012

50 day goals

I'm a bit late in posting this as there are 246 days to go til my TCRG exam, but I thought I would separate out the next 8 months of my life into 50 day blocks and have a set list of things to achieve during each. Day 200 is on the last day of April so my deadline will be easy to remember and is what inspired me to do this.

So, the goals I need to achieve before the end of next month, in order.

1 - Learn Garden of Daisies once and for all!

2 - Complete another two non-trad sets as a minimum

3 - Finish writing out all the ceilis in full and after that, complete 5-10 past papers as pass them all!

4 - Teach three ceilis that I haven't yet danced or taught - as a minimum

5 - Dance in heavy shoes at least once per week

6 - Drill one traditional set dance per week

7 - At least one music quiz per week

That's plenty for 46 days I think. To prepare I've completed a list of ceilis I need to dance/teach to take to class, and to be honest I'm thinking of a few shortcuts here. For example instead of teaching the Eight Hand and Morris Reels separately, I'm going to combine the bodies - so it might go Extended Sides, Skip Across, Sides, Right Hands Across, Back to Back, Return Chain. I've already taught both figures so this might be a bit more interesting for the class.

I've pencilled in a private lesson of sorts to get Garden learnt and I have the version I'm learning on video (different to Olive's) which I will watch and try to work out ahead of my session.

I wrote out three more ceilis last night - St Patrick's Day, Trip, and An Rince Mor. I know I hashed up the second figure of Trip but I think Paddy's Day was right enough. I blanked on ARM so I doubt I got that right but I'm waiting until I've written out all 30 before I mark, so it will be another couple of days.

Dancing in heavy shoes, a must. I'm actually quite good in my socks but that's not going to go down too well at the exam. As a dancer, all too often I threw off the shoes and carried on in my socks because I knew I was better without them. Well what was the point in that?! I need to get used to them. Even if it means wearing them around the house and throwing a few trebles in as I pass from room to room.

I am REALLY fired up for this at the moment. So damn keen, thinking about dancing constantly, coming up with new steps all the time, wishing there was a feis every weekend....I even find I'm lilting to myself! Bring it on...but don't let the time go by too fast, I've still got a lot to do!

PS - in less than three weeks I'll be at the Worlds. Can't wait!

Monday 5 March 2012

Congratulations Nina!

If you follow this blog you might just find something interesting over at After the 40 Bar Finish. Nina's blog isn't just about the TCRG so it's much more interesting than mine, with pretty pictures too! The reason for posting this is that Nina received the all-important email today and found out she passed her TCRG exam. Congratulations! Nina's teaching partner Mary is the reason I know the set of Job of Journeywork and because I'm nosy I started following their school on Facebook. Big well done to Nina - me next! :)

Friday 2 March 2012

Where I'm at

March already?! I've no idea where this year has gone so far but it really needs to slow down as I've got a lot to do. I'm confirmed for an exam at the end of the year, and as you'll probably have guessed by all this talk of set dances - I applied for the TCRG exam rather than the TMRF. Teacher, friends and family all thought my TMRF idea was a waste of money and I just needed some more confidence in myself, so I followed their advice. I certainly don't feel as desperate as I did at the very start of the year, when I had very little solo material under my belt.

Here's what I have so far:

Reels - plenty of grade level dances for the teaching part, plus enough steps for the dancing exam
Hop and light jigs - plenty of steps for the teaching
Slip jig - grade versions for teaching and a full dance for the dancing part
Heavy jig - beginner steps for teaching, a solid step for dancing
Hornpipe - beginner dance for teaching, two steps for dancing
Trad sets - Paddy's Day, Blackbird and Job
Sets - two! White Blankets and Fiddler Round the Fairy Tree in full.

So I still need:

Reels - a boys' reel! Maybe another step to be sure as well.
Slip jig - My dancing version is prelim level so I'll need a more open-level step for teaching
Heavy jig - primary and intermediate level steps for teaching, plus another step for dancing which will need to be a bit harder than the one I have
Hornpipe - again, grade level steps for teaching, and a boys step for teaching would be good too as the ones I have are nice and girly
Trad sets - just Garden
Sets - seven!

It's shaping up quite nicely I think. I could do with picking up another solo class per week but it's difficult with work and so on, as it's further away than the Monday class and starts earlier too!

For the writtens, I'm regularly scoring 100% on music which is my target for the exam. Ceili written is where I'm falling behind a touch - I still remember all the movements, formations, music notes etc for each dance, I'm just slipping on being able to write them out in full. Still, I know they're in the locker and I can brush up on them any time - dancing is the priority for the moment. I will make the effort to write a couple of dances out this weekend though, as our class is cancelled. I'm still regularly dancing ceili, too.

I can't tell you how proud I am of myself. They might be meagre little achievements in anybody else's book but I've learned two hornpipe steps in one class after not dancing it for years, and I've choreographed two sets all by myself. I've still got 7 or 8 months to go, too, so the straits are not yet dire.

Physio has prescribed me some gym time (my hips need loosening, a lot) so I'll be getting fitter and more able to practise for longer.

I can't wait to be a teacher :)

Friday 10 February 2012

Remembering

Just now, for some reason, I remembered something I'd done four or five years ago. I was at work, at my old job which had a terrific view of a car park from the window, and I was daydreaming about going back to dancing. I'd been out for a while but I still kept up with all the results, still went to the odd feis with friends, still loved it of course. Danced around the house. I thought, maybe I'm too old to be a dancer now. I couldn't afford the dresses and travel now that I'm a grown-up with no support from the parents. I pushed the idea to one side but for the rest of the week, looking out at that car park and daydreaming, a different idea began to form in my mind.

Why couldn't I take the TCRG? Isn't that what I'd always wanted anyway? I knew I'd never be a world champion, but I'd idly fantasised about teaching my own. I decided yes, I'll do it. I remember opening the syllabus on clrg.ie, reading it and making a mental checklist of the huge amount of work I'd have to do. I remember going back to it every 15 minutes throughout the morning, reading and re-reading, until lunchtime when I could furtively print it out. Two copies. I read it again, highlighting one copy with things I knew (green) and things I would still have to learn (pink). My pink highlighter began to look tired. I stacked up all the sheets very neatly and placed them in a file on my desk. I forgot to take the file home. It sat there for a week, maybe two, before I remembered it. With a sigh, I opened the file and put all the papers face-down in my recycling bin. It was too hard. I couldn't do it on my own. Who was I kidding? I would never pass. I would never be a teacher.

I can't think what has caused this memory to push to the surface - out of all the other things I could be remembering, why is it this? Over the years I've held back from doing a lot of things out of fear and lack of confidence. Even recently - with my first solo Saturday class - I was initially terrified. Why? I know what dancing is, I've done it before, I can do it to a fairly competent level, I knew some of the people that were going to be there. Why so scared? I know, I have always known, that it's just the build-up that frightens me. The actual event itself, not so bad. My first solo class was great, even though I was dying after the warm-up and breathing out every available orifice. But this is a different one. I'm actually fairly sure I wouldn't have passed the TCRG if I'd've attempted it five years ago.

No big events really happened in between printing out all those papers, and then actually beginning my study for real in April 2010 (that long ago?!). No major life-changing occurences, no epiphanies, no angels visiting me in the night. But there definitely has been a gradual change in me, with the love for dancing remaining the constant. I'm more patient, both with others and myself. Now, I can explain the rising step fourteen different ways to try and help a dancer get it. Then, I'm sure I would have got us both frustrated. I'm more personable. I'm sure this is a confidence issue, but I now have the capability to be encouraging, even warm and friendly as opposed to polite and shy. Those are personal things that will make me a better teacher.

I watch and appraise dancing more analytically now. For example I never struggled with timing myself, but I never really noticed when someone was just slightly off time, but I can now. I can not only spot little faults in dancers, but can actually come up with reasons why they're doing it, and fixes for it. I'm sure before I would have noticed something wrong, but short of saying 'work on posture' or 'practice crossing' I'm not sure I could have offered a dancer more guidance. Now I can say, if you do x, you'll correct y. You only do x when you're doing y, so let's look at y. Too much algebra there I'm sure, but I am starting to think I can do it, and do it reasonably well.

So in a way, I'm glad that I put all those papers face-down in my recycling bin. I wasn't up to the job then, and I feel like I'm getting close to it now.

Saturday 4 February 2012

I HAVE A SET!

Yes ladies and gentlemen...I have a whole set dance. Choreographed by my own fair hands to boot. I'm really pleased with myself but so, so annoyed with myself too. Why didn't I do this months ago? I was constantly making excuses when really there was no reason not to. I could have completed all of them and had nearly a year to practise them all, couldn't I? Well, something's changed. I actually have a teacher now, a great teacher who encourages me. Who really wants me to do the TCRG exam. Who I don't want to let down. Who I want to impress if at all possible!

I haven't practised my White Blankets a whole lot - and sadly class was cancelled today due to the weather. That does give me a bit more time until I brave Teach and show her. I've put bits into it that I can't yet do either - there's a treble and toe combination that I can do on the left foot in jig timing, but not yet on either foot in hornpipe timing (although I know it works as I've seen people do it). But I'm playing it safe 99% of the time, so throwing a bit of difficulty in there isn't going to kill me.

So - next. I have a jig step which is dead easy, probably too easy to dance in the solo section. But, I can use it as a step for a jig set, maybe tart it up a little bit in places, and then go mad and choreograph a jig set. I'm going for Fiddler Round the Fairy Tree - love the tune, struggle to recognise it in music quizzes sometimes, love the length. 8/12/28. I've literally just thought up the first two bars as well. Ten to go!

I'm also going to resurrect some ceili revision - three dances at a time, written out without the book and then marked. I'm going to start with Book 3 just to keep it interesting.

So no more being annoyed at myself for stalling for so long as that won't accomplish anything - just get on with it. On we go.

Tuesday 31 January 2012

I have a step.

No shit. Honestly, I've made up a step. It actually goes with the music as well, so long as I really rush that treble in after the over-and-down. Six whole bars! I could even do one of the simple treble combos while rotating to make it look fancier, ha. So a further 12 bars of genius required for the set before the week is out. This'll be easier though, I plan to use up the first 2 bars on a rock sequence and I can do a lot of stuff on one foot only, so filling sets is much more manageable when I don't have to backtrack due to realising I can't do said movement on left foot.

I've also realised that I when I top up my savings account this week, I'll actually have half of the exam fee. So I can apply. I. can. apply. Oooooooh dear lordy.

I just need someone to believe in me and look how quickly I can come on.

Monday 30 January 2012

This week's challenge

Note to self.

Make up a set dance. Stop stalling and pretending you can't because you haven't danced in ages - just make one up. You might end up scrapping it when you get better at choreography but for now, just make one up. Make it hard for yourself by choosing a hornpipe set, but make it easy by choosing a shortie. The White Blankets, there you go. Do that one. By Saturday class, you will have a hornpipe set that you have actually danced rather than just thought through. You might even be brave enough to show your teacher! Do it. Stop looking at hornpipes on YouTube and stop blogging about it and just do it.

Wednesday 25 January 2012

Tunes n Trip

I've spent the last two nights revising from the Olive videos, saying the movement aloud before the dancers get to it, watching the trickier bits, and making a list of mistakes. Personally I didn't make many but it did give me the opportunity to tidy up a few things in my own mind.

Next week, I'm planning to teach The Three Tunes. I've told them there's a "fight scene" in it so they're dead keen! But, I always mess up the order. I know the order of the repeated moves, I know that Sides comes first and Lead Round comes third, and that Thread the Needle comes before the final Roly Poly. I CANNOT get the other movements straight.

In correct order, the movements are:

Sides
Rings
Lead Round
Stamp and Clap
See Saw
Roly Poly
Hook and Chain
Rings
Sides Under Arms
Stamp and Clap
Thread the Needle
Roly Poly

Racking my brains and this is the only way I can think of to remember it: See Saw comes before Sides Under Arms in the Sweets of May. Hook and Chain goes in the middle. Or Hook goes with Haste. Hmm.



And, Trip. I know this one quite well but when writing it out I can never work out who goes under who arch first. Tops make the first arch so the order of passing under is: Opps under tops, opps under opps, tops under tops, tops under opps. Opps, opps, tops, tops. This makes no sense to anybody :)



Doing this has made me realise though - I do NOT know any of the ceili tunes. Not well enough to lilt in an exam anyway. I could get by with St Patrick's Day and Haste to the Wedding I reckon, Roly Poly part of the Three Tunes, but nothing else. This needs WORK. Off to iTunes to create a playlist I go - I got 100% in a music quiz earlier so I can park that for a while and work on ceili music instead.

Tuesday 24 January 2012

New steps

I love the smell of new things. New car smell, new magazine, new clothes fresh from the shop, new carpet. Naturally new steps have no olfactory qualities, but with them comes the very faint scent of passing the TCRG exam. I finally did it. I finally went to a class and started learning steps. I died a horrible death in the warm up and when trying to demonstrate the slip jig that used to be my pride and joy, but I went! And in my defence, I didn't do too badly. Everything is well remembered, everything was executed to a higher standard than I was expecting. I'm not going to pass yet, but I'm on my way. There is time to polish and time to learn more. When I have more steps in my locker perhaps I can choreograph some of my own as well. I already have a potential step in my head for the White Blankets.

I just loved the class as well - it was freezing and it reminded me of winter competitions in chilly sports halls, when I'd win all my grades and come home with armfuls of plastic trophies. I did some teaching, I did some learning. It was exciting, inspiring. I have plenty to practice before next class, and plenty of revision too. My music is fine, so I'm going to have a good read of the book, a good watch of the videos, and start regularly drilling them to keep them fresh. On it.

Friday 13 January 2012

Class tomorrow

Oh my Christ. I've got a solo dancing class tomorrow. A genuine solo dancing class, not just me practising on my own - a real class with a real teacher. For the first time in years - actually the first time in nearly SIX years doing prelim/open level steps in front of a real teacher. Shit the bed. I'm actually looking forward to it believe it or not, but as always I have "first time nerves". I just need to get the first class out of the way (for want of a better phrase) and then I'll be fiiiiine. Tomorrow is the day I take the final step towards the TCRG exam.



Thursday 12 January 2012

"If you get it wrong, you have to get it right. You can't just leave it."

The second post with this title! It does surprise me, how often I return to the wisdom of a ten year old. I have got to start putting more effort into this. I really, really want to be a teacher and I don't have the handy excuse of not being able to afford the TCRG exam anymore. It'll be a stretch but I CAN afford it, so why the delay now?

I know the ceilis, all of them, just need a brush-up and some more practise paper...well, practise. I've taught or contributed to teaching probably half of the ceilis now, including many of the eight hands. I reckon virtually every candidate gets at least one eight hand so I need to do as many of those as possible and be comfortable with them.

Music - fine, brush-up only.

Traditional sets - three out of four ain't bad. They too need a brush-up, and they need to be practised IN SHOES.

Solo dancing...I have a new philosophy on this. Surely, SURELY, they wouldn't mark too cruelly if you'd nailed the traditional sets and writtens, and done well on the teaching. SURELY this is the least important part of the exam. I'm going to try hard not to worry too much about this, and keep it simple. I have a handful of tricks I can throw in and hopefully that'll be enough. I have options for reel, slip jig and jig. For the sets, as short as possible and as simple as possible, with the odd trick in the set part. I am telling myself repeatedly that this will be enough, and that as a prospective teacher it's better to do well on the theory and teaching than on the dancing. Yes?

Solo teaching is something I never do. Hopefully I can start contributing soon, but through watching dancing more frequently I know I can spot faults more readily than I used to. I'm actually quite breezy about this, with my main worry being the difficulty of the steps. I've thought of a way around that, I think...