This time last year

...I was failing my TCRG exam.

Well, if you take it by the calendar I was actually on the way to Glasgow, a horrifically lonely and nauseous seven-hour train journey. I'm flying this year. And technically I passed the first day.

If you take it by the day, I was getting ready for my dancing exam. You know, I surprised the life out of myself at that dancing exam. I couldn't believe I didn't cave. More to the point I couldn't believe I was even there. I got back to my room afterwards and actually shouted YES! I exceeded all my expectations and danced quite well. Ok I knew I'd fudged my Rodney's and made some of the set up on the spot as I blanked, and I made a little mistake in St Patrick's Day, but I honestly thought I could have passed it.

It's still a matter of huge frustration as a) if I only needed to retake teaching and not dancing, I might have been able to afford it in June and the ankle injury wouldn't have been an issue. I would know by now. I would be a TCRG by now. And b) because dancing isn't going so well this time and I can't help think that rather than make up those two tiny marks, I might go backwards. I wish I could just get up in front of them, dance St Patrick's Day again (but right), and that'd be it.

To be honest I don't know what I'll do if I go backwards in the dancing. I'm getting older, not better. It's now exactly 4 weeks til I have to do it again. 28 days. On the 15th of December it'll be all over. I can only use those 4 weeks to do as much work as I humanly can, and pray that it'll be over for good, and not just over for another year.